Understanding Why Men are Reluctant to Lead Family Devotions Part 2

Often men are less than eager to lead family devotions. And they have pretty good reasons. When we understand the reasons behind their reluctance, we can find ways around it. Last time we looked at three of the big issues that tend to hold men back.

1. Men like to be in CONTROL.

2. Many men FEAR they aren’t qualified in some way.

3. Men don’t want to FAIL.

 Now lets look at a few more reasons men shy away from leading family devotions.

4. Many men just don’t want to take on the RESPONSIBILITY of it.   

Men often feel like someone is dumping the whole responsibility of leading family devotions on them.  Generally that person is their wife.  And if their wife tries to make it sound like leading family devotions won’t be hard, a man will be convinced she has no idea how tough the job really is. That will make him even more determined to avoid it.

So men may avoid taking on the responsibility at all costs.  The way they see it, once they start family devotions, how will they get out of it when it becomes obvious things aren’t working out? And maybe he’s tried and failed before. He has no intention of repeating history.

Since a man often feels family devotions will be a disaster, he’d rather not take on the responsibility—and will avoid it at all costs.  Many men would rather risk looking like a jerk to their wife than to fail at family devotions and feel they have to quit. They can’t stand the thought of the kids looking bored—which is what they think will happen. A man will often think it is easier not to ever start than to start and quit.

 5. Some men don’t realize the IMPORTANCE of it.           

They may think they can leave the spiritual training of the kids to the church.  Or maybe they simply don’t grasp the need for additional training at home.  It is a low priority in his mind—and that puts it at the bottom of his list.

 6. Some men can’t seem to find the TIME.

 Leading the family in some kind of devotions takes thought and prep.  Many men legitimately feel they don’t have the time. 

 Any one of these six areas is enough to hold a man back.  Read over the list.  If your husband is dragging his feet when it comes to leading family devotions, likely one or more of these issues are a factor.  You’ll want to be sensitive to these things when approaching your husband for help.  For a man to move forward and succeed at family devotions, he’ll need to get over the issue that is holding him back. In the next blog post, lets look at a different approach to helping your husband than you might have tried before.

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  1. Patricia L. Malachowsky

    my husband is an elder in our church and an anointed teacher. but when the kids were younger he brought home a devotional that was from the same company that my dad read daily devotionals from when i was a kid without reading the scripture portion. i had been so turned off by it that when my hubby showed me the book, my face showed dismay rather than the joy he was expecting to see. he refused to ever try again. he leads Bible studies at our church, but will not lead them at home. 🙁

    • Oh, Patricia, I hurt with you on this one. I can see how you would have reacted as you did, and I understand how your husband reacted as well. The good news is that your sons grew to love the Lord.

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