We’ve been talking about ways to add fresh passion to your marriage over the last couple of blog entries. One of the big things we talked about last time was to “do the things you did at first.” We’re talking about doing the types of things you did when you were dating or when you were first married. The kind of stuff that drew you close to each other. We started listing some ideas, and now we’ll add more.
-What would your mate like you to change? You made all kinds of changes when you were dating. Changed the way you dressed, the way you acted. You kicked habits and made new ones . . . all to please your date. Time to do it again.
-What would your mate like you to do? Maybe there’s a project they’ve wanted done. Someplace they’d like you to take them. When you were dating, you were looking for ways to please them. You probably have a good idea of something that would please them now. Do it—without complaining. Just to show how much your mate means to you. This is huge.
-When your mate calls you on the phone, answer it like you’re really happy to talk to them. That’s what you used to do when you were dating, right? If your mate gets the impression that your call is an interruption to their busy day, what kind of message are you sending—and what will that do to improve your marriage?
-Have some fun . . . together. When you were dating, you looked forward to the times you had together. You’d go out, do fun things. Are you still doing that? If your idea of fun is something that doesn’t involve your mate, you may want to rethink that a bit. Life is tough. Make a deliberate effort to create some fun times with your mate and it will make a difference in your marriage.
Sometimes the best way to improve the future of your marriage is to look back at the attitudes and perspectives you used to have toward your mate. Think about the way you acted in those early years of being together. It worked before, and it will work again . . . if you work at it.
Next time we’ll look at some little things that mean a lot . . . especially when it comes to strengthening your marriage.